Looking for advice from FP who were just pre-adoptive homes, not ...

I can tell you this, having those kids moved to prevent them from bonding any more is NOT the right thing to do. Continual disruptions damages children. Nobody knows what tomorrow brings. I would not put my hopes on forever. I made that mistake with my girls. Other than visits, neither parent was doing their plan. But through circumstances I can't share, in month 19' just when the plan would have changed, bio mom secured housing, and that was good enough for all involved.

I too was hopeful for adoption, and since I was limited to two kids for first two years, I couldn't get any other placements or pursue adoption. So yea, there were times I wanted to disrupt. But nothing prepares you for the pain of their departure and had I done that just to make my life plan easier, I would have always regretted it.

I know that the time with me will mean something to those girls. And there is no guarantee that the next one will be forever either. But I know this, everything happened as it did so that I would be in the right place and time to get my little Chubbs. It has always been bittersweet, knowing that I would not have him had I not lost my girls. But I know tat he was meant to be my son and me his mother.

I worry all of the time for my girls. Not being able to see them and knw that they are ok is the worse pain. So prepare yourself for RU and maybe get to know the bios and then maybe you will be the lucky few who get to see the kids after RU.

Nobody says you can't pray for them to stay, but bereal with yourself, moving them isn't better for them, even if it may be for you.

Source: http://forums.adoption.com/foster-parent-support/406355-looking-advice-fp-who-were-just-pre-adoptive-homes-not-straight-fc.html

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